Tag Archive | seedlings

Waiting for good

When I last saw my Doctor on Wednesday we chatted at length about the time it is taking me to recover from my latest bout of depression. I suppose like all things, it gets harder as you get older.

She reassured me that I am heading in the right direction, albeit at snail’s pace, but that during my recovery phase I can expect to have good days and bad days. I have to learn to accept the bad days and be kind to myself and I also need to recognise good days and not do too much. I have been waiting for a good day and today has been one of the best for a number of weeks. Of course it is all relative and I need to remember that I am not recovered, I am just not as despairing and hopeless as I have been. But it feels good.

I have achieved more today than I have for a long time but made sure that I had plenty of rest as well in between short bouts of activity.

I managed to pot up my seedlings. Sitting in the lovely warm sunshine with a barrow full of compost in front of me, I was quite content.

Seedlings potted up

Seedlings potted up

I did a tour of my garden taking note of all the new growth bursting forth at last. Here are some of my favourite bits.

Green shoots

runner bean seeds

Today I have one aim. To sow the seeds of my recovery and devise and write-up my personal “Depression Buster Plan”. It won’t be a 5-minute fix but it will  focus on;

Short, medium and long-term strategies for recovery

Aims and goals for sustained improvement over the coming weeks

Plans A, B and C to take into account days where some aims will just be too difficult.

Rewards for success; Rewards for trying; Rewards for not beating myself up when I can’t face Plans A, B or C.

Work, exercise, diet, lifestyle and hobbies will all come under the microscope with the sole aim of reducing stress and increasing resilience.

But first, I need to get outside in the fresh air and space. Hiding away from the world might be comforting but I am in danger of turning into a troll so I will spur myself  on to spend an hour or two looking through my seed packets and decide what to plant this year.

Herbs for the kitchen windowsill, a giant pumpkin for fun, bell peppers and tumbling tomatoes for the patio and I must have some sunflowers for late summer. Everything else I will leave to my better half who is much better at growing vegetables than I am.

It will be nice to measure my progress against my seeds and plants.

Nothing forced; strong, steady, healthy growth with plenty of water, good nutrients and sunlight.

Perfect.

Runner bean seedlings